Detour

Not blogging here anymore. My life is more interesting here.

Good

day

sir

.

R.I.P. Teddy P.

There are certain things about your childhood you will always remember. For me, one of those things is this song:



As I listen to it now, there is a memory of me sitting in the back seat of our car looking out the window at the nighttime landscape passing by and hearing this song. Fogging up the window with my breath and drawing random shapes or writing things I shouldn't be writing, but I can easily erase it with a wipe of my fingers.

Goodbye Teddy.

What I'm Feelin' Right Now

Cutty Lue's upcoming mixtape. Go to his myspace page and listen to "Cutty Lue (MIXTAPE)....shhhhh" for a taste.

This version of Jason Derulo's "Whatcha Say" (the song, not necessarily the video):

(props 2 Vadinne)

This song by Drake:


Funny man Red Grant:


The latest Kick-Ass trailer:


Bobobo-bo Bo-bobo:


Playing as Coach on L4D2...especially on Live! For you fellow L4D2ers, I found this video pretty informative.

Speaking of zombies, make sure you add this to your Zombie Plan. I just got my first can as a gift! Wish I could provide a pic, but I left it in the office. And to some of you, this may seem like a foolish move because you'll say, "But Willie. What if the zombie invasion happened this weekend? What good would that can of bacon be in your office?" It's called remote storage of food. That can of bacon has a shelf life of 10 years and I'm sure my office building will remain standing for some time. So, no matter where I may be when the zombies invade, I can take heart in knowing I've got that priceless little jewel in my office...waiting for me...and my homemade maple syrup. Oh, but now you might say, "Willie, you're a fool. You told everyone where you've left it, so it will probably be jacked before you can get to it. Muahahahaha!" By who? I've only got like six readers and I know a few of you might have a Zombie Plan, but only a couple of you have one that isn't imaginary. And those people know the most important rule in a post-zombie world...everything is free game.

I'm out. Love, peace and afro grease.

The Films of 2009

Ran into this and thought it was very cool, so I had to share. Being an editor, I have to bow to Kees van Dijkhuizen's well constructed collaboration of footage and sound. I've watched it a couple of times and it still wows me. Sit back and reflect on some of the films you may have seen last year as well as a few others you should definitely try to catch.

Planet Pandora

Planet Earth is probably one of the best documentary series ever done. It shows the wonder of our planet in spectacular detail with breathtaking shots and wonderful narration. The original series was done by the BBC and Discovery Channel redid it with Sigourney Weaver narrating. If you've never watched it, you should really add it to your viewing queue. It is truly awesome.

Sigourney is also in Avatar, which reached a billion dollars worldwide...in just TWO weeks! Yes, the movie is that good. Many can relate to it, but it also contains a certain amount of depth. It is a story that has been told many times before, especially in the world of Japanese anime, but Cameron's telling of it is visually stunning. Anyway, someone in Jimmy's camp realized Sigourney did Planet Earth and decided to do an Avatar-based featurette in similar fashion. Enjoy.

Twenty-Ten

I guess that is how people are going to reference the new year. Before you could say, eighty-seven, or ninety-four, or oh-eight. You can't really say one-oh. Don't sound right. If rappers can't rap it then it won't work. "Ah yeah. Funky Mo Soy Sauce here in the one-oh." Maybe it works. I'm going to stick with twenty-ten. Regardless, Happy New Year to y'all!

I started off my new year by getting some bromance time in with my boy Ken and we watched Avatar. After the movie, I shotgunned my critique of it via text message to a few of you. I run the risk of my kids reading this blog, so I can't quote it. Too bad because it was a pretty accurate description of my experience watching the film. I'll just tell you the movie was damn good and I HIGHLY recommend it to everyone. In my last blog, I listed my top 10 films for the oh-nine. If I'd have watched Avatar before that blog, then it would have certainly made the list and I would have bumped The Hurt Locker. Like I said before, James Cameron is a film-making mastermind. Make sure you watch it in IMAX3D so your brain can get properly violated.

Here is another film I'm looking forward to seeing in the one-oh. See, it just doesn't sound right. Anyway, check out the latest piece of work from wizard who gave us The Dark Knight.

Favorite Movies of '09

Crazy. It's the final curtain call for 2009. Tons of stuff has happened this year and you'll be inundated with a bunch of different TV shows reiterating every single moment. From Barack Obama's swearing in, to Tiger Woods failing Pimp School. For my end of year review, I'm going to share with you my list of favorite films I enjoyed in the oh-nine. Take note, I haven't seen Avatar yet. I know, I know. I'll get on it. I promise. When I read other people's top 10 lists, I tend to skip over their summary of the film. So, I'll make sure to keep mine short with the hopes you'll stay interested. Plus these aren't given in any particular order.

Up - Pixar rules storytelling. Yes, I cried.

The Hangover - Funny. Funny. Funny. Makes me want to go to Vegas as well as stay far away from it.

Star Trek - I want to be J.J. Abrams when I grow up. Watched it six times in the theater and religiously a couple times a month since.

Inglorious Basterds - A WWII story only Quentin Tarantino can tell. Loved "The Jew Hunter" and Eli Roth demonstrating his baseball swing.

Taking Chance - Phenomenal film based on a true story. Felt on the verge of tears from the very beginning and yes I shed them several times through the film. Kevin Bacon was meant to wear a military uniform.

District 9 - If a group is oppressed over a period of time, what usually happens? A revolution. Thank you Peter Jackson for taking a chance on Neill Blomkamp.

Watchmen - This is what comic-based movies should look like, plus there's blue wiener.

Zombieland - Read World War Z. Play Left 4 Dead. Watch this movie!

Where the Wild Things Are - We all have our own personal memories of childhood. This film made me relive mine wonderfully. Yes, I cried.

The Hurt Locker - Kathryn Bigelow took something terribly violent and made it look beautiful. Remember there has been plenty of American blood spilled on the sands of the Middle East and still continues to spill.

I'll have to get to Avatar sometime next week. Especially since it's grossed 725 million dollars worldwide in less than 2 weeks. Love him or hate him, James Cameron is a mastermind of a filmmaker.

Happy New Year folks!

Next on The Improv Stage

Back on my old blog I wrote about the many-worlds theory. I would link back to the old blog, but it no longer exists...at least not in this universe. No worries, basically many-worlds means there are an infinite number of parallel universes that exist for us. So, where you made a left in this universe, you made a right in another and so on and so on.

I'm pretty sure in another universe I'm a pretty famous comic. I say that because I've always been fond of comedy and I've been told that I can be a funny guy at times. I even considered being a comedian when I was in high school, but I also considered being a Space Shuttle pilot, porn star, professional skateboarder and an OB/GYN. When you're in high school, the world is still your oyster until you start to pay taxes.

Well in this universe there are some really funny comics getting some airtime on Comedy Central. Here are a few I recommend you check out.

Josh Blue

Jokes.com
Josh Blue - Being Inspirational
comedians.comedycentral.com
Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

Lynne Koplitz

Jokes.com
Lynne Koplitz - Lollipop
comedians.comedycentral.com
Joke of the Day Stand-Up Comedy Free Online Games

Gabriel Iglacias


And my new favorite funny girl. Anjelah Johnson

Bad Edit? Who Cares. It's a Parody.

Woke up this morning with a link from Vadinne to a parody of Lonely Island's "I'm on a Boat". Funny stuff, plus the Asian girl in the bikini dancing is a nice bonus...even though she's lacking in the onion department.



And while reading my daily ration of other people's blogs, I caught this on The Corporate Whoracle. It's especially funny if you know any cougars personally...of course I do.

100 Billion Strong

A while back I blogged an excerpt from one of my all time favorite books, American Gods by Neil Gaiman. At the end of it I said, "I believe we're significantly insignificant." Here is what I meant:

Merry Christmas!!!

Hey there folks. I certainly hope this Christmas finds all of you well, in good health and with loved ones. I've finished all my Christmas shopping (took care of the last of it early this morning) and now I'm going to just chill and wait until Santa shows up to share some Sam Adams Winter Ale with me.

We went driving around the neighborhood to see some of the lights our neighbors have done up in their yards. Some of the houses look really good. I'm not big on decorating for Christmas, probably because we go all out for Halloween. Here are a few of the illuminated cribs in my neck of the woods.







Looking forward to not only watching the kids open gifts in the morning, but also go to work on the big Christmas feast. For those of you that know me also know that I can get my burn on.

Merry Christmas everyone!!!

Subscribe to This Blog...Not My Blog...Yes My Blog, But This One Too

Because I said so, and I'm the boss of you. Seriously though, it is a fun blog and it always makes me laugh. The writing is superb, and you can't help but to find the truth in his, sometimes, ridiculous banter. It is only updated once in a blue moon, but each update is worth it. You've got 129 previous posts to catch up on anyway.

Stuff White People Like

Cuz white folks like a lot of stuff for many fun reasons.

Oh Saint Nicky, Don't You See...

Just saw this and YouTube had it so I can share! And sharing is what Christmas is all about!



And then I found this!



Black Santa represent! North-side!

Mmmmmmfiveguys

I love a lot of shows on Travel Channel. Anthony Bourdain - No Reservations...LOVE it! Dhani Tackles the Globe...love it AND it reminds me I really need to workout. Madventures...those Finns are some crazy ass mofos. Man v. Food...he must have some mad doo-doos AND it reminds me I really need to workout. Bizzare Foods...don't love it as much as I used to because now Andrew just annoys me.

My new favorite TC show? Meet the Natives - USA! If you haven't watched it, I highly recommend you tune in. The premise is very simple. Grab five guys from the remote South-Pacific island of Tanna and let them spend a week with five different American families, all from varying walks of life. The show is both very entertaining and enlightening. They have an almost child-like approach to everything they experience, but they bring with them so much wisdom and real honesty. Here's a sampling:







Keep an out for indigenous nudity you crazy kids!

But I Can Kick Your Ass!

I've blogged briefly about the movie Kick-Ass, but it was more inspired by the character Hit-Girl. Well some more Hit-Girl-induced-Kick-Ass goodness has just hit the web. Oh yea, I'm DEFINITELY going to go see this movie! Red band trailer, by the way. Consider yourself warned!



Props to Harry for giving me a good breakfast!

30 Second Doses of Goodness

You think making a movie is tough? Imagine making a commercial. You have 30 seconds to convey your message and leave a memorable impression upon the prospective consumer. Millions are spent on these tiny pieces of eye candy with the hope that investment will pay back hundredfold. Here are a few of my current favorites:









And of course...



Get crackin' you crazy kids!

More Than Lighting Up The Christmas Tree

Have I mentioned how much I love Pomplamoose? Oh yeah...I have! Merry Christmas!!!



Jemara just reminded me...6 days!

I'll Have the Cuba Libre With My Breakfast, Please

Back in a past life, I used to have to wear a uniform and sometimes Uncle Sam would order me to go to Roosevelt Roads Naval Station in Puerto Rico for periods of time to do cool military stuff. Trust me, Puerto Rico isn't the most difficult of assignments a young airman can receive. I really had a great time whenever I went and I'm surprised I survived each trip relatively unscathed. Yes there was danger involved with the "cool military stuff", but the real danger was the super cheap bottles of Puerto Rican rum and how easily it poured down my throat. I remember one morning, after a long night of clubbing, my buddies and I decided to get some breakfast. We sit down at an outdoor bistro/breakfast booth kind of thing and on the menu was the typical Puerto Rican breakfast fare. I think I got eggs with ham, some damn good local bread and fruit. When asked what to drink I look up at the menu and I notice cuba libre was cheaper than orange juice. For those of you not in the know, a cuba libre is basically a glass full of white rum with a splash of coke to change the color slightly and a lemon or lime wedge. So, being a broke airman, trying to save all the money I could, I got the cuba libre, of course. Good times.

The whole conversation about Puerto Rico was supposed to be a segue for the competitive reality show, "The Sing-Off". Before I get started, I'm not really a big fan of these types of shows. It isn't that I don't like them because I've watched the very first season of "American Idol" as well as "America's Best Dance Crew". My buddy, Dusty, is a big fan of "So You Think You Can Dance" and she's shown me some really cool stuff from that show (in fact, she just blogged about it). So, I do watch those types of shows, but the real problem I have with them is they take too long to get to the end. There are like 20 contestants and they slowly whittle them down one-by-one until you reach the climactic finale. So, I find myself not watching it until they get to the last few episodes.

"The Sing-Off" is a little different because the show started on Tuesday with 8 groups and by Thursday they had it narrowed down to the 3 finalists. The voting lines are open and they'll announce the winner on Monday. Yes, a competitive reality show that is only a week long...PERFECT! Anyway, the premise of the show is groups sing songs sans instruments...all a cappella. Yes, most of the groups remind me of glee clubs, but there is one in particular that owns the competition. The group is Nota and they're from Puerto Rico...enjoy:




Finally, how in the hell do you do an a cappella version of Peter Gabriel's "Sledgehammer"? Like this:

For As Cool As Apple Can Be

Why don't they support Flash on the iPhone/iPod and why won't they let you embed Quicktime trailers? If you're going to take over the world with shiny silver things that make our computing interactions easier, then they should be able to knock those simple things out. C'mon Stevie, hook a brotha up! Well since I can't embed a Quicktime trailer to my blog, I'm going to request you all go here. Click on the down arrow to the immediate right of the "Watch Trailer" button and select one of the HD versions (I recommend 720p). Wait for the trailer to load then hit Ctrl-F, crank up the volume and enjoy!

While you're at it, check out the updated Clash of the Titans trailer with even more clashing goodness!

Kick-Ass!!!

Jemara started a Swear Jar at home. Everytime daddy says a bad word, I put a dollar in the jar. The term "jar" is being used very loosely. The "jar" is really her purse and she's gotten about 15 bucks from me over the past couple weeks. I do my best to not cuss around her, but sometimes (and usually while I'm playing the Xbox) a bad word or two will slip out. That girl has cuss-word-induced hearing though, because as soon as I curse she immediately pops out of hiding, like a money collecting ninja, with her palm extended and a big grin on her face. I am slowly getting better though. Anyway, I figured I could blog curse words all I want because I don't say them outloud. I won't push my luck though because I'm sure Jemara would figure out some Swear Jar loophole so she could collect on both spoken and written words. She's too darn smart for an 11 year old.

Why is this blog titled "Kick-Ass"? Because that is the title of a movie coming out next year. Being a comic-based movie, it's been a tiny blip on my radar the past couple months. The trailer came out and I was impressed, but it wasn't like Watchmen-induced nipple erection. Well, that was until I saw this:



Here's the trailer:

'

Thanks to Merrick at AintItCool for showering me with the goods. Have fun kicking ass...oops, I mean butts you crazy kids!